These lame excuses and satanic justifications are annoying. When something is wrong, that thing is wrong: no perfuming or deodorizing it.
One good thing, though, is that these comments and counter-comments identify us, and situate us clearly where we all stand!
The truth is that the majority or a great percentage of men have raped women, at one time or the other: a neigbour’s child, a sister, a cousin, a sister-in-law, platonic friends, nannies, stranded colleagues, lonely women (nursing their broken hearts), a naive girl (looking for someone to trust), trusting classmates, nieces, our students, secretaries, office-cleaners, office-assistants…some of these girls later became their girlfriends or wives or had some relationships with the men. What could they do?
It has always been a man’s world, and taking her by force (kidnapping, abducting, eloping, seizing the opportunity….) has conventionally been misinterpreted as a sign of valour!
And women accepted it as such – after all, the men have always held the levers of advantage: power, tradition, money, work, control…as breadwinners, employers, teachers, overseers, deliverance-ministers…! In other words, rape (including sexual abuse) is about power, control, and sometimes even vengeance!
And added to the above, to worsen matters, are the related issues of mental disorders in men as well as occultic urgings like ritual-sex, ritual-sacfrices, etc, etc.
Today, though, more and more women are gainfully employed, they are baking their bread, climbing to the top without sexually transmitted degrees/promotions, shattering the glass-ceiling and shaking tables.
And, now that the tables are shaking and turning furiously, with the stress on “Consent,” and “No” meaning exactly “No,” many women are emboldened to come out and loudly too. Shame is no longer enough to hold them down! They are talking. And, in talking, they are encouraging the Talking culture or the Rape conversation! It’s a new day for women. And the opening of a Pandora Box for men!
Suddenly, the men are feeling vulnerable and powerless: with the rage of feminist power, who knows which lady will damn the shame and speak out next?
Many men are also feeling guilty and trapped deep in their subconscious! Things may fall apart further….
They think the only way to come to terms with their guilt, without apologizing (no one can tell the outcomes of such a confessions), is to do verbal ablution and hope to find some relief in rationalizations: “Women too rape men,” “She enjoyed it too,” “Indecent dressing is the cause,” “the women are seducing us,” “There are different types of rapes,” “Women must stop tempting us,” “some girls are born with seducing spirits….”
But this is lame. It’s weak. And it’s escapist. It’s unmanly. Real men do the right things. And one right thing is introspection. This can and should be our Moment of Truth!
Women are neither “earned allowances” for teachers nor the spoils of office for holders of high-office; and girls are neither toys for CEOs nor the fringe benefits attached to corporate success!
Our “five minutes” may cause them a lifetime of regret; and our “valour” may leave them emotional cripples and tether them in their emotional valleys!
We don’t eat food that is “open,” when we see harlots, with all their “openness,” we hiss; when we want to relax or travel, we look for the exclusive, VIP sections that are closed; and even we build our homes, we fence them, with solid gates!
Meaning: Men like covers, coverings, clothes, enclosures. Why are “exposed women” the exception? Something doesn’t add up. Could not our excuses be a camouflage for our mental disorders?
Yes, “indecent dressing” may tempt us, so do fine cars, five-star hotels and beautiful houses for rent! Do we just break into those cars or forcibly enter the hotels? Are we then sick or urged on by darkness?
When we complain about dressing, do we submit that our education is useless; that our faith is a sham; and that, even though we have gone to the moon, London, Dubai etc, we are still, at heart, cavemen?
Please, please: All the rape-cheer-leaders, hanging the blame of rape on the victims of rape, in the name of “indecent dressing,” take a clinical look at number of rape cases from May till now, and count how many of the victims were walking on the streets”naked!”
If you get 10%, come back let’s talk. But if you don’t, quietly run to Mt. of Fire & Miracles for your deliverance: you are a rapist, waiting for a victim!
By Simon Imobo